どんなに考えても“行動”しなければなにも変わらない

考えたこと

こんにちは
前回は習慣の話をしましたが、今回は「行動」についてお話したいと思います。

僕は「どんなにいろいろなことを勉強したり、考えたところで行動しなくてはなんの意味もない」と考えています。
そこで行動を見直してみました。
13年間の中でうまくいかないこと、うまくいったことを繰り返しながら到達した答えです。

結論、ポジティブだろうがネガティブだろうが行動しなければなにも意味はないのです。


本音の中に建前をうまく差し込んで行動する。

最近はなにかと「本音で話す」ということが正解だと言われる風潮があります。
それはある意味正しくて、ある意味では正しくないと思います。

なぜ本音がそんなに重宝されるのか。
単純に現在の社会の在り方によるものでしょう。

近年は将来への不安から”働く”ということに対することが見直されています。
うつ病、パワハラなどのハラスメント、ジェンダー様々なことが社会問題として取り正されています。

これまでの「上から言われたことを従順にこなす」ということが正解と言えなくなってきたわけです。
アメリカなどの先進的な働き方からの乖離もそうさせたのでしょう。

ですが、「本音で話す」とは本当に正解なのでしょうか?
僕は「本音で話す」だけでは足りないと考えています。
もちろん本音を一切話さずに隠し続けるなんてのは、なにもよいことではないと考えています。

自分がやりたいこともできず、間違っていると思っていることでも従わなくてはいけない。
そんな生き方が楽しいとはどうしても思えないのです。

僕は「本音の中に建前をうまく差し込んで話す」が正解だと思っています。

言ってしまえばただの技術なんですが、「本音で話す」ということにフォーカスしすぎる人が多いような気がしてならないのです。

自分を「ハッキリと話せる快活な人」だったり「サバサバした後腐れない人」という人物像を演出している気なのでしょうか。
正直言って「ただ口が悪い人」とか「協調性なく、人を傷つける人」になってしまっている人がいる気がしてならないのです。

もちろんグダグダと相手に気を遣うあまり、ものすごく遠回りに話す人も良いとは思えません。
「いっそハッキリ言ってくれよ」と思うことが何度もありました。

もちろん「本音で話す」ことを大切にしている人全員がそうだとは思ってはいません。
ですが、これまで僕の周りには極端な人があまりにも多くいました。
正直どちらの人もストレスでしかありませんでした。

そこで「本音の中に建前をうまく差し込んで話す」ことが重要なんです。
言いたいことをズバズバというのは楽ですし、気持ちよいものでしょう。
ですが、思っているよりもそれは難易度が高いと考えています。

例えば上司に何か言うときに本音を全部話していたとしたら、どうなるでしょう。
中には「本音でぶつかってくれる部下」と高評価を受け、重宝されるでしょう。
ですが、一部には「自分のやり方に従わない生意気なやつ」と低評価を受ける可能性すらあります。

ただの同僚ならまだしも、上司との折り合いが悪くなってしまったらどうなるでしょう。
そのストレスは本音を我慢することよりも遥かに高いのではないでしょうか。


行動するときに確認する3つのこと。

別に上司・部下という関係性を大切にしろ、ということではありません。

しかし、「親しき中にも礼儀あり」と言うように「本音を話すことは大切だから」と、すべてを話していては失礼に当たる可能性もあります。

ではどうすればよいのか
それは「立ち位置を理解して行動する」ということです。

上司・部下という立場を例としてお話しします。

まず、上司はあなたになにを求めているのでしょうか。

それは単純に「成果を上げて、問題を起こさないこと」です。
それを理解せずに自分の言いたいことを言ってしまうとどうなるでしょうか。
あなたの評価は「ことあるごとに反抗する人間、頼みづらい存在」となってしまうでしょう。
その結果あなたには重要な仕事が回ってこないなどの弊害が待っている可能性すらあります。

ではどうするべきなのでしょうか。
「疑問点はちゃんと確認する。あいまいにしない」ということです。

部下として任された仕事をこなすということが求められていることなのであれば、それは行わなければいけません。
その上で「本音を話さなければいけない場面」があるとすれば、「納得のいかないことがあるとき」でしょう。

その時に自分を納得させるためにも、仕事の本質を理解する必要があります。
まずはそこを確認すること、それをするだけで自分を納得させるだけでストレスは減るでしょう。
意味のわからないことを強制されるストレスというのはものすごく大きいですから。

ですが中に「聞いても答えてくれない上司」という人も存在しますよね。そんな人には「本音の中に建前をうまく差し込んで行動する。」のです。

例えばどうしても意味を理解できない仕事を渡された場合、僕はいくつかのことを確認するようにしています。

・精一杯仕事を行うこと
・その仕事をしたことでどんな効果が生まれるのか
・その仕事の重要度

少なくともこの3つは上司と確認しあうようにしています。

まずは、しっかりと遂行する意思を表明します。
過去にいろいろと質問をしたら「なに?答え次第でやりたくないって言うつもりなの?」キツメに長いこと説教されたことがあるので…

その上で「自分の成長のために」という視点から「意味」を確認するのです。
「自分からの視点ではわからなかったが、上司からの視点からなら理解できた」ということは思ったよりも多くありました。

もしもなにも確認せずに取り掛かっていたら、ずっとそれがわからないままだったでしょう。
それは「自分の成長のために」は何一つなりません。
また、「意味」を理解して行うことができた仕事はスピードも、クオリティもまったく違いました。
相手の求めているものをしっかりと理解できたということが大きかったということです。

あなたが反発するのは自由です。
ですが、大抵の上司や先輩はあなたの立ち位置をすでに経験していることが多いです。
反発するなとは言いませんが、「なぜこれを任されたのかということの意味」を理解してからでも遅くはないと思います。
そのため、あなたは「後輩、部下である」という立ち位置を理解して行動しましょう。

そしてあなたが「先輩、上司になった」ときに「意味」を含めて指導することができれば、あなたの立ち位置はさらに向上していくことになるでしょう。


”行動”なくては何も変わらない

ここまで「本音の中に建前をうまく差し込んで話す」「立ち位置を理解して行動する」ということをお話ししました。これはある”前提となる条件”があります。それは”行動すること”です。
あくまでもこの2つは”行動すること”が前提として、行うべきことなんです。
なにを思ったとしてもまずは”行動する”ことを前提として考えてください。

なぜならば「行動しないことには状況はなにも変わらない」からです。

不満があったとして、なにもしなければその不満はなくなるのでしょうか
なくならないですよね?
ならば行動するしかないのです。

「時間が解決してくれる」もちろんそういったこともあります。ですが、「時間が解決してくれることと、解決してくれないことがある」というのも真実なのです。
あなたが行動しない限り、あなたが持っている問題はなにも解決しないのです。


ゆずらない場所を持って行動する。

ただ、あなたが「とにかく行動する」としても、「ゆずらない場所」は持ってください。
建前を言おうとも、本音を隠そうとも、何をするとしても絶対にゆずらないものは必要だと僕は思います。

家族のことでも、法は犯さないということでも、なんでもいいのですが、「これだけは絶対やらない」という領域を決めてください。

例えば僕は「公平、公正でないことはしない」ということを心がけています。
これは「関わる人に胸を張って言えないことはやらない」ということです。

例えば「企業である以上売上を上げ続ける」という目的のために「法令違反を犯す」ということが、現状まかり通っているのがおかしいと思っているからです。
「俺の会社は売上を常に前年以上に上げている!!」ということを大勢の人の前で言えたとして、その手法が「従業員に対して多すぎる労働時間と、少なすぎる休日を強いた結果生まれた」としたら胸を張って言えますか?
言えたとしてすがすがしい気持ちでい続けることができるのでしょうか。

僕は自分の人生を楽しいものにするためにも「公平、公正でないことはしない」ということを心がけています。
もしもこれに反することを言われた場合は、どうにかして公平、公正であるように変換して行っていくようにしています。

ゆずれない場所を持っていると「これ、なんのためにやっているんだろう」ということが圧倒的に減ります。

「なんのために」迷わなくもすむということですね。
「とにかく頑張ったけど、なんのために頑張ったんだろう…」ってなかなかつらいですよね。

そんなときに「ゆずらない場所」を決めていると、少なくとも「ゆずらない場所を守った」ということだけは達成しています。
これってなかなかでかいんですよ。

「目的」を見失わなくてよくなるんです。
精神的に疲れてしまっているときに「目的」を重視し、それをこなすことを考えていると余計に疲れてしまうことがあります。

「目的を持つ」ことの重要性は過去にも話しましたが、それは健康な状態の時の話なんです。
疲れてしまったときは「ゆずらない場所」を守ることだけを考えて行動してください。

「ゆずらない場所」を守って行動すると

いうことは「あなた自身を守る」ことにもつながると僕は考えます。


まとめ

いかがだったでしょうか

「どんなにいろいろなことを勉強したり、考えたところで行動しなくてはなんの意味もない」

それは、
1.本音の中に建前をうまく差し込んで行動する。
→余計なストレスを生まないために
2.行動するときに確認する3つのこと。
→・精一杯仕事を行うこと
・その仕事をしたことでどんな効果が生まれるのか
・その仕事の重要度
3.”行動”なくては何も変わらない。
→自分の問題は自分で解決していくしかない
4.ゆずらない場所を持って行動する。
→結果として自分を守ることにもなるということです。

あらかじめ自分の行動に基準を設けておくと、そのあとの行動が楽になると思うので、一度考えてみることをおすすめします。

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